35+ Women Are Sharing Their Gyno Horror Stories & Unfortunately, They’re Far Too Relatable

This article appeared in Thefashionball and has been published here with permission.

The Doctor Is In

No one expects going to the gynecologist to be a particularly pleasant experience but it’s one of the necessary evils of life. However, there are limits to how excruciating these types of appointments are meant to be. Sadly, these particular doctors absolutely shattered those boundaries. These women are confessing the most horrific experiences they’ve had while getting their lady bits checked. The worst part? These stories are all way too relatable…

Is it His Business?

This doctor seems to be extremely confused about his role in this young woman’s life. His job is to take care of her nether regions, not to judge her choices. What this girl’s parents think about their daughter’s lifestyle is their business and none of the doctor’s concern.

Is It His Business?

His one and only worry, at this point, should be his ability to keep patients from leaving his practice for less judgmental doctors, because that doesn’t seem to be working out too well for him…

She’s Giving Fashion Advice, Now?

So, apparently, having piercings and being tanned equates to being promiscuous? First of all, there’s nothing wrong with a woman enjoying multiple partners. Second, promiscuity doesn’t really have a “look.”

She’s Giving Fashion Advice, Now?

We’re also extremely concerned about this gynecologist questioning why her patient was even there if not pregnant or potentially infected with a disease. Shouldn’t the doctor, of all people, know the importance of a yearly checkup? We’re glad that this woman noped out of there, we would have done the same!

Is That Really a Question?

Does this gynecologist really not understand the differences here? Having a cold metal clamp shoved into a woman by a doctor, without any sort of attraction or concern for her comfort is one thing. Having an intimate and desired moment with a chosen partner is another.

Is That Really a Question?

There’s a big difference between the two. Or, sometimes, it’s a small… ahem, difference. We can all agree, though, that these situations are most definitely not the same.

Yes, Really

Yes, doctor, women of all sizes are beautiful and deserving of love. That should go without saying, really. It should also go without saying that it’s not the doctor’s place to question a person’s life choices, when they want medication related to intimacy, or why they want it.

Yes, Really.

The fact that the OP felt the need to validate her life choices by explaining that she ended up marrying the partner in question just shows how badly this gynecologist messed up.

Why We Never Assume

Doctors, of all people, should know never to assume anything about anyone. How is a young woman supposed to feel comfortable talking to her gynecologist about personal things, when she feels judged based on certain assumptions?

Why We Never Assume

This nurse was way out of line. So, we can see how a first experience at a gynecologist’s clinic like this one could leave a bad taste in one’s mouth. Perhaps this is why a lot of women choose not to get checkups as often as they need?

They’re Actually for Anyone

A common misconception is that seeing a female gynecologist will be better than going to a male doctor since one would expect a woman to understand what women, as a whole, go through. However, that could not be farther from the truth. A bad doctor is a bad doctor, regardless of their gender.

They’re Actually for Anyone

Clearly, this gynecologist’s personal biases were stronger than her solidarity with womanhood. As the OP mentioned, this procedure is for anyone who feels they need or want it.

Quick! Hide the Sewing Kit!

We appreciate that this gynecologist didn’t seem to mean any harm, that being said, her sense of humor is most definitely an acquired taste. It’s also really important to gauge one’s audience whenever telling a risky joke.

Quick! Hide the Sewing Kit!

Perhaps, given her profession, that just wasn’t the time or place to make fun of those things. While we understand that it was just a joke, we kind of feel bad for the doctor’s daughter, as she’s had her privacy violated with her mother’s humor.

“Be Safe” and Switch Doctors

This young woman wanting to understand the mediation she’s putting into her body has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not she’s being safe in regards to intimacy. Everyone has a right to understand the medication they’re taking and it’s the doctor’s responsibility to explain it to them.

“Be Safe” and Switch Doctors

We’re pretty sure that this gynecologist wouldn’t just take medication without understanding, at least a little bit, what it was. So, why wouldn’t she offer the same courtesy to her patient?

Thanks for the Life Advice?

Someone needs to explain to this gynecologist that he’s not a therapist or life coach and this woman didn’t ask for his advice. We’re seriously hoping that his views on medicine aren’t as outdated as his views on career and marriage.

Thanks for the Life Advice?

While there’s nothing wrong with marrying wealthy or being a stay-at-home mom, it’s clear that this wasn’t the direction the OP was hoping to go in. On the contrary, she might become someone’s sugar mama!

As Many as She Wants

Context is truly important here. It’s completely acceptable for the gynecologist to ask about a patient’s number of partners for the sake of knowing what type of tests to run. However, if she asks in a judgemental or condescending tone, that’s a completely different story.

As Many as She Wants

Given how the OP feels about the situation, we have to assume that the latter is true. In that case, it’s most definitely time to switch doctors!

Does He Think He’s Helping?

It truly seems like this doctor is projecting quite a bit here. Maybe their partner has been unfaithful to them in the past, and they now think they’re protecting their patient’s husband from the same fate?

Does He Think He’s Helping?

Really, there’s no reason for them to suspect that this woman intended to be unfaithful just because she wanted a procedure done while her husband was away. Even if she was planning to step out on her man, that’s none of the gynecologist’s business.

Spot the Difference

Personal biases have no place in medicine. Unfortunately, there are many institutions that put their own feelings before the evidence placed in front of them. This woman had to go through a terrifying experience because of that and we’re just glad that she went to get a second opinion.

Spot the Difference

Imagine if she hadn’t gone to the other clinic, she’d probably have started treatments that she didn’t need, and who knows what they would have done to her health!

Bedside Manner Level: 0

We have no doubt that the OP is perfectly gorgeous at any size. That being said, if she’s unhappy with her weight and believes it’s due to her medication it’s the gynecologist’s responsibility to look into that.

Bedside Manner Level: 0

Unfortunately, it seems that this doctor had no interest whatsoever in admitting that the medication could be the culprit. We wouldn’t mind if she had run some tests and then came to that conclusion, but she didn’t even consider the OP’s concerns!

Don’t Underestimate Your Patients

There are a lot of people who will simply look online for answers to their health questions and then confuse their Google search with their doctor’s degree and years of professional experience. For that reason, we can understand this gynecologist’s frustration.

Don’t Underestimate Your Patients

That being said, this obviously wasn’t the case with this woman and her doctor should have realized that she clearly knew what she was talking about. This is why we never underestimate people, so we don’t end up as the villain on someone’s Reddit post.

Surprise, Surprise

Let’s be honest — no one looks forward to those types of exams. It’s natural for someone to become anxious at the idea of this procedure and to physically clench up because of it. However, doing a surprise exam is most definitely not the solution.

Surprise, Surprise

People always have a right to know what tests are being done on them, and what’s going into them, even if that means things will be a little more difficult for the doctor.

But She’s Not His Daughter

Ah, the good old “what if?” What if she were his daughter? Then that conversation would at least be somewhat appropriate. What if this gynecologist was professional and did his job properly? Then that conversation wouldn’t have happened at all.

But She’s Not His Daughter

Instead of asking himself “what if” this woman were his daughter, this doctor should really just focus on answering her legitimate question about intimacy without passing judgment that she didn’t ask for.

A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

We’re not really sure how those places still manage to function, given that they’re pretending to be something they’re clearly not. It’s unclear how qualified these so-called “doctors” are. In any case, they have no right to advise women this way.

A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

We’re glad that the OP was able to identify that place for what it really was and managed to go elsewhere else before causing any more harm to her body. Lesson learned: Always double-check that the place you go to for exams is really what it claims to be.

Scout’s Honor

This one is really the mom’s fault, not the gynecologist’s doing. We have to admit, though, as awkward as it must have been, it’s still pretty funny! It was probably just as uncomfortable for the doctor as it was for the OP.

Scout’s Honor

Well, everyone needs a day job, and all women need to get their privates checked, so these types of situations probably aren’t that uncommon. The best way to get through it is just to grin and bear the awkwardness. Isn’t that what a good girl scout would do?

Why People Don’t Trust Doctors

The fact that the OP didn’t go back to a gynecologist for years proves how problematic it is when doctors mess up like this. It’s extremely dangerous to go that long without ever getting a checkup but, clearly, the OP was traumatized.

Why People Don’t Trust Doctors

This is why doctors really need to be at the top of their game. It’s not just about dealing with the patient’s physical health but, during a procedure, they’re responsible for their mental health, too.

Um… Oops?!

Sorry Doc, but we’re not really sure that “oops” is going to cut it here. Due to this gynecologist’s negligence, the OP’s boyfriend now has a disease that he could have completely avoided getting.

Um… Oops?!

Not to mention that the OP could have started treatment for the issue a full three weeks earlier! This doctor is going to have to do a lot better than that feeble apology if you ask us. The OP’s life lesson is a good one, though, we’re definitely writing that down!

Say Less

Given that this gynecologist had no way of knowing what the OP’s relationship with her sister was like, it was completely inappropriate that she revealed the sister’s information. While it may seem like a harmless enough comment, one can never really know what an individual wants to be revealed or hidden about themselves.

Say Less

Also, that careless pregnancy comment?! It’s not “good” or “bad” to be pregnant, it’s all up to the patient and what they want.

Logic Isn’t for Everyone

This gynecologist seems confused as to who’s in what role in that office. Why would the procedure hurt her when she’s the one doing it, not the one it’s being done to? Furthermore, different people have different pain thresholds.

Logic Isn’t for Everyone

Therefore, to say that something shouldn’t hurt someone just because it doesn’t hurt her is tone-deaf at the very least. We think the OP should have kicked that doctor in the face and then said, “Well, it doesn’t hurt me…”

“Call Me, Maybe?”

How does this doctor’s office not have a system put into place for these exact scenarios? They can’t rely on every single employee to work there forever, so there must be some sort of transference of information.

“Call Me, Maybe?”

The moment the OP’s gynecologist left that practice, their cases should’ve been given to a different doctor. Now we’ve really learned: Always call for test results. Never rely on the doctors to call you, even though that’s part of their job.

Does She Meet People Unclothed?

We understand that the gynecologist would eventually need this woman to undress and that it would be within a perfectly professional context. That being said, there was absolutely no reason for the nurse to be rude to the OP.

Does She Meet People Unclothed?

She could have at least tried to accommodate the OP’s request and if the doctor truly didn’t have time to go to the room twice, the nurse could have explained that kindly. She seems to have forgotten that her job is sensitive and empathy is important.

Every Body Is Perfect

We have no doubt that every part of this woman’s body is perfect, including the private parts. Either way, that was a completely inappropriate comment for the first gynecologist to make.

Every Body Is Perfect

Unless it’s important information for the patient’s health, the doctor has no place making throwaway comments on their patient’s physical appearance. At least the second doctor seemed to fix the first one’s mistake. It’s just a shame that the OP felt needlessly insecure about that for so many years.

Um, What Did She Find?

Two things are wrong here: One, the gynecologist should really be completely sure of what she’s saying before she announces it to the patient. She could have very easily taken the extra few minutes to confirm her suspicions before saying anything.

Um, What Did She Find?

The second issue is that she didn’t properly explain why she thought the OP was pregnant in the first place! She’s really just going to let this poor woman wonder what was in her nether regions?

No Glove, No Love

That doctor should probably have his license suspended, at the very least. We wonder if he does that to all his patients… Whatever went on here, it’s clear that this woman was completely traumatized, and rightfully so!

No Glove, No Love

There’s a life lesson to be learned here: Whenever seeing any type of doctor for the first time, always bring someone you trust who preferably knows the procedure to be with you. That way they can make sure that everything is Kosher.

Did Someone Ask for Her Opinion?

We have no idea why this gynecologist felt the need to comment on aspects of the OP’s appearance that aren’t related to her gyno-specific health. While it’s acceptable for a doctor to comment on one’s body in relation to their wellbeing, there needs to be a certain level of tact involved.

Did Someone Ask Her Opinion?

Regardless, these opinions don’t seem necessary anyway as they were irrelevant to anything health-related. Therefore, they were completely inappropriate and uncalled for.

Is That the Professional Term?

Is “I told you so” the professional term for this situation? Really, it’s the gynecologist’s job to explain pregnancy prevention options but it’s not her place to judge or insist on anything in particular.

Is That the Professional Term?

If the OP and her partner are happy with their method of pregnancy prevention then it’s the method that’s right for them. The doctor has done her job and should take a permanent step back from that point onward.

Ummm, Thank You?

How does one respond to this incredibly awkward compliment? Also, why does this gynecologist even consider it to be a compliment? Or something to comment on at all?

Ummm, Thank You?

While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being inexperienced in intimacy, there’s also nothing wrong with having a lot of experience, or any amount of experience in between. If you ask us, someone really needs to congratulate this doctor on their complete lack of social awareness.

How Would He Know?

Given the fact that this gynecologist does not have a cervix, he really shouldn’t get an opinion as to whether or not it hurts. He truly needs to just trust his patient in regards to what she’s feeling.

How Would He Know?

Despite this doctor’s comment, the OP really has no incentive whatsoever to lie about being in pain. If anything, the procedure would probably be done much more quickly if the OP pretended that everything was okay.

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Someone really needs to explain to this gynecologist that she needs to keep her hands, or fingers, to herself. We’re all for every type of exam and making sure that a patient is healthy but there’s a way to go about it.

Keep Your Hands to Yourself

All medical procedures must be explained beforehand and consented to. It’s pretty sad that we actually need to explain this again and again, and that some doctors need to hear it, isn’t it?

Give Her All the Medication

We’re in pain just thinking about what this poor woman went through! Truly, the doctors should have probably rescheduled her procedure. Then, there’s the issue of the instrument getting stuck which sounds absolutely terrifying.

Give Her All the Medication

Lastly, we appreciate the nurse wanting to protect the gynecologist from getting kicked in the head, but let’s be honest: Kicking him in the head probably would have been at least a little bit cathartic for the OP.

Double Standards

We’re not exactly sure what the underlying issue is here… Is it that doctors think women’s pain doesn’t matter? Or, do they think that women are simply invincible? Either way, the problem needs to be resolved as what this woman went through sounds horrific.

Double Standards

The fact that the OP’s husband was treated when the OP, who was probably in equal pain, if not more, was denied treatment, just shows the double standard in medical care.

We’d Prefer the Allergy

We’d definitely prefer an allergy over what this woman thought she had but how could the doctor have made such a huge mistake? It seems pretty unbelievable that the OP could go four whole years unaware of what’s really going on with her body.

We’d Prefer the Allergy

In all that time, all that she had to do was change the soap she was using. What a waste of worry and treatments, all of which could have easily been avoided had the gynecologist been just a bit more thorough.

Third Time’s Not the Charm

While we appreciate that a doctor’s time is often extremely limited and valuable, she needs to appreciate that her work is sensitive and it’s perfectly natural for people to need a break from the pain. If she’s unable to accept that then perhaps she’s in the wrong line of work.

Third Time’s Not the Charm

There’s no acceptable scenario for someone to have to ask multiple times for a procedure to stop, once should be enough. Period.

“Just Deal With It?!”

Let’s be honest: Enjoying alone time with one’s partner is crucial in romantic relationships and intimacy isn’t something that should be just checked off a list of things to do.

“Just Deal With It?!”

We find it extremely hard to believe that this gynecologist would not prioritize her own well-being if she were in the same situation. She knew perfectly well that the advice she offered the OP was useless and unrealistic, she simply didn’t care.

We Know Our Bodies Best

Doctors may be the official medical professionals but, at the end of the day, we tend to know our own bodies the best. If something feels off to a person then chances are that something is actually off.

We Know Our Bodies Best

While we respect that the gynecologist wouldn’t want to completely base her professional opinion on the patient’s intuition, she could have at least double-checked. If not for medical reasons, simply for the sake of making the OP feel at ease.

This Doctor Isn’t “the One”

Well, the OP’s friend may have thought this gynecologist was “the one” doctor for her, but clearly, they’re not. There’s no need for the gynecologist to comment on this woman’s relationship, their job is to simply resolve the medical issue and that’s it.

This Doctor Isn’t “the One”

Furthermore, there’s truly no reason to believe that the boyfriend in question knew he was infecting the woman he was with. We say he could still very well be “the one” but this doctor most definitely is not.

Stretch Marks Should Be Celebrated

We happen to believe that stretch marks are beautiful, especially pregnancy stretch marks, as they’re a sign of giving life. We certainly don’t blame the OP for being angry, and we understand she was unable to react in a physical way, but there’s always the option to use words.

Stretch Marks Should Be Celebrated

She should have said something along the lines of, “Look how awful your personality is! Aren’t you doing anything about it?” Now that should hurt!

God Would Prefer Silence Now

The gynecologist may think that God prefers abstinence, but we’re pretty sure that God would prefer for the doctor to be quiet, do her job, and mind her own business.

God Would Prefer Silence Now

It kind of seems like this doctor decided to study medicine simply because she wanted to lecture people about abstinence. If that’s the case, there are fake clinics that she can most definitely work at but she should stay away from the real ones which actually help people.

But… Why?!

We sincerely hope that there’s some context missing from this story because it truly makes no sense. What incredibly unprofessional lack of boundaries are those?! Does this gynecologist do that to all their patients or do they have some sort of personal relationship with the OP?

But… Why?!

Is anyone else reminded of that episode in Friends when Joey realized that his tailor was not “doing pants” the appropriate way? Yeah, this is like that only it’s real life.

She Told Him So

Why would the gynecologist simply decide that this woman is “promiscuous?” Even if she was, so what? How is that any of his business? All he had to do was conduct the test, keep his mouth shut, and wait for the results.

She Told Him So

No one had asked him to place bets or wage guesses as to what the test results would say. We have no doubt that the OP’s “I told you so” was the most satisfying one of her life!

Are You Getting Fired?

The moment the gynecologist asked this woman, “Are you getting married?” the OP should have answered, “Are you getting fired? Yes!” A doctor should know better than anyone that pregnancy prevention and marriage don’t necessarily go hand-in-hand but being a good doctor and remaining impartial should definitely go together.

Are You Getting Fired?

We’re glad the OP realized that she shouldn’t have to explain herself and, instead, explained to the doctor that she needs to do better.

You Don’t Say?

This woman warned the doctor and the gynecologist simply insisted that he knew better. How could he possibly know the OP’s body better than the OP herself?! It’s fair enough to have an ego about one’s fancy medical degree and professional experience but those things are no match for someone’s self-awareness.

You Don’t Say?

Dear doctors: We know you mean well, but sometimes you have to just listen and trust that your patients know more about their bodies than you do.